Slangs - C

[Keane]

cabbage    Noun. 1. A person in a catatonic state or seemingly brain dead.
2. The female genitals.
Verb. 1. To sit around doing little, to be idle. E.g."It was a great holiday, we just sat around cabbaging, topping up our tans and drinking cocktails."
2. To damage, to injure. E.g."Last year I cabbaged my knee playing football, and it's still not fully recovered" [Northern use?]
cabbaged    Adj. 1. Intoxicated, by alcohol or drugs, to a state of uselessness. From being in a vegetative state.
2. Exhausted, extremely tired.
cack *   Noun. 1. Rubbish, nonsense.
2. Excrement.
* Also 'kak'.
cack-handed    Adj. Clumsy, without manual dexterity.
cackhander   Noun. A left handed person.
cack it / oneself   Verb. To be terrified.See 'cack'. E.g."I cacked myself when I looked over the edge of the cliff at the sea 200ft below."
cacky    Adj. Dirty, rubbishy.
caff    Noun. A cafe.
cake-hole    Noun. The mouth. E.g."Shut your cake-hole and get on with your work." Cf. 'pie-hole'.
call (someone)   Verb. To insult (someone). [North-west use]
camel's hoof   Noun. An impression of the female genitals/vulva as seen through tightly worn clothing. Cf. 'camel toe'.
camel toe   Noun. An impression of the female genitals/vulva as seen through tightly worn clothing. Also camel's toe and camel toes. Cf. 'camel's hoof'. [Orig U.S. 1990s]
camp    Adj. An effeminate style and mannerism affected mainly by 'gays', however anyone can 'camp it up.'
camp as a row of pink tents   Phrs. Very 'camp' (see above), or gay. E.g. "He was a camp as a row of pink tents and wouldn't have been out of place in a Mr Gay UK competition." Cf. 'camp as a row of tents'.
camp as a row of tents    Phrs. See 'camp as a row of pink tents' (above).
camp it up    Verb. To overact in an affected manner. E.g."If you want to see people camping it up, walk down Canal Street in the Gay Village in Manchester on a Saturday night." See 'camp'.
cancer stick    Noun. A cigarette. Cf. 'coffin nail'.
caned    Adj. Intoxicated.
caner   Noun. A person who indulges in excessive bouts of drug or alcohol use.
cane (it)    Verb. 1. To travel at great speed. E.g."I caned it down the motorway and got there in record time."
2. To overindulge in drugs or alcohol. E.g."I've been caning whizz (amphetamine sulphate) all weekend and had no sleep for 3 days."
cank   Verb. To talk, chat or gossip. [Midlands use/Dialect]
cankles   Noun. Usually of women, fat ankles that lack definition and seem to merge with the calves of the leg. A combination of the words ankle and calf. Also occasionally 'kankles'. [Early 2000s. Possibly orig. U.S.]
canny   Adj. Good, nice, pleasant. E.g."She was a canny lass." [Scottish/North-east use]
cans    Noun. Headphones.
cant    Verb. 1. To talk, to speak. [Midlands use/Dialect]
2. To tell tales, to lie. [Midlands use/Dialect]
can't be arsed    Phrs. Can't be bothered. See 'arsed'.
cardie   Noun. A cardigan. {Informal}
cark (it)   Verb. To die. Also 'kark it'. E.g."Princess Diana carked it in car crash in Paris." [Orig. Aust. 1970s]
carpet muncher   Noun. 1. A lesbian.
2. A person who performs cunnilingus.
carpet munching   Verb. Performing cunnilingus.
carrot top    Noun. Nickname for a person with red/ginger hair.
carry out   Noun. Alcohol brought from a bar with the intention of taking it home or away. [Northern use?]
carry the can   Vrb phrs. To take responsibility for a mistake. E.g."I'm not carrying the can for your inability to control your kids." {Informal}
casey   Noun. A leather football.
cast nasturtiums    Verb. To sully a person's reputation. A pun on 'cast aspersions'.
catch flies    Vrb phrs. To look blankly with one's mouth open.
catch some z's    Noun. Get some sleep. Pronounced catch some zeds. Original U.S. version is pronounced catch some Zees.
catch you later!   Exclam. Goodbye!
cat's pyjamas   Noun. The best. Cf. 'cat's whiskers'.
cat's whiskers    Noun. The best, most sublime thing or person. Cf. 'dog's bollocks' and 'bee's knees'.
cattle truck *   Verb. 1. To have sexual intercourse.
2. To ruin, destroy. See 'cattled'.
* Rhyming slang for 'fuck'.
cattled   Adj. Broken, worn out. From the rhyming slang 'cattle truck' and hence meaning 'fucked'. E.g."Looks like we are staying at home for the weekend, the car's cattled."
Cavalier    Noun. An uncircumcised penis and consequently a male with such. Cf. 'Roundhead'.
chalfonts   Noun. Haemorrhoids. Rhyming slang. From Chalfont St Giles, a town in Buckinghamshire, rhyming with piles.
chalk (farm)   Noun. Arm. Rhyming slang.
champion    Adj./Adv. Excellent. Also used as an exclamation. [Mainly Northern use] {Informal}
channel surfing    Noun. Switching from one television channel to another in search of an interesting programme. [Orig. U.S.]
chap   Noun. 1. A man. E.g."This chap came up to me and told me to shut my mouth." {Informal}
2. A form of address. Usually associated with the speech of the upper classes. E.g."I say old chap, fancy joining us for a gin and tonic?" {Informal}
chapel hat pegs    Noun. Erect and prominent female nipples.
char    Noun. Tea. From the Chinese cha.
charged   Adj. High on drugs. [Orig. U.S.]
charity-case    Noun. A person deemed rightly or wrongly to be in need of charity, whether poor or handicapped in some manner. Derog.
Charlie    Noun. 1. Cocaine. Probably the most commonly used slang term for this drug.
2. A fool, an idiot.
charlies    Noun. Women's breasts.
charlie's dead!    Exclam. A euphemistic warning for your petticoat or slip is showing. An expression rapidly becoming obsolete with the changing of fashion away from wearing such items.
charver    Noun. 1. A boy, or adolescent male.
2. A close friend, a 'mate'. [Northern use?]
3. An unruly, young person, typically wearing casual, brand-name sportswear, such as Nike, Adidas and Reebok. Usually more associated with poorer, urban environments. Also 'charva'. Derog. [Mainly North-east use]
chase the dragon    Vrb phrs. To smoke heroin by burning the drug on foil and inhaling the smoke through a tube.
chattin' shit   Vrb Phrs. Talking nonsense.
chat up    Verb. To talk flirtatiously with someone, to make sexual overtures. {Informal}
chav *    Noun. A person, usually of poorly educated, working class origin, who dresses casually in designer sportswear and vulgar jewellery. Chavs are generally viewed as an ignorant under-class with a propensity for criminal or loutish behaviour. Usually derog. [Orig. South-west. Popular from early 2000s]
* For a more indepth view see Chav
chavette   Noun. Specifically a female version of a 'chav', see above.
chavtastic   Adj. Of, or related to 'chavs', see above. E.g."He was wearing a Burberry baseball cap, Rockport boots, tracksuit bottoms and a fat gold chain draped around his neck - it was the most chavtastic sight to behold this year."
chavvy   Noun. A child. [Polari]
Adj. Of, or like a 'chav'. See above.
cheap as chips   Phrs. Extremely cheap. Chips, referring to French Fries, and from the period when they were considered an inexpensive meal.
chebs   Noun. Female breasts.
cheeky chappy   Noun. Affectionate name for an attractively impudent person or animal, one who may make one readily smile.
cheeky monkey    Noun. A light-hearted name for a verbally impertinent person.
cheerio!   Exclam. Goodbye! {Informal}
cheers!    Exclam. 1.Goodbye!, a parting salutation. {Informal}
2. Thank you!, an expression of gratitude. This is the globally accepted and most understood of the uses of cheers. {Informal}
cheese    Noun. Smegma. Alluding to the look of this male bodily secretion and perhaps the smell.
cheesed off    Adj. Fed up, angry.
cheeselog   Noun. A woodlouse. [Berkshire use]
cheesy    Adj. Corny, cheap and hackneyed.
cheesy (quaver)   
Noun. 1. A favour. E.g."Oh God! Do my a cheesey quaver, will you? Dont make me get up early tomorrow morning."
2. A raver, a person into the lifestyle and music of hardcore house and techno. [1990s]
* Both definitions from rhyming slang. Quavers, Cheese Flavour - a potato snack manufactured by Walkers Snack Foods Ltd.
cheggers   Adj. Pregnant. Rhyming slang on preggars. Also occasionally spelt cheggars. See 'Keith Cheggars'.
chelp   Noun. Impudence, cheek, especially by a child to an adult. E.g." I want you on your best behaviour when the vicar calls; any of your chelp and you'll be grounded for the week." [Midlands/Northern use. Dialect]
chemicals    Noun. A euphemism for chemically manufactured illicit drugs, such as MDMA, Amphetamine Sulphate or LSD, as opposed to Cannabis etc.
cherry    Noun. Virginity as in to lose one's cherry. Previously applied to the hymen but now the term is used by both sexes. One is also able to lose one's anal cherry. Cf. 'pop someone's cherry'.
chesticles   Noun. Women's breasts, often implying either small or cute.
chevy (chase)   Noun. The face. Cockney rhyming slang. [Mid 1800s]
chew the fat    Vrb phrs. To chat. E.g."Yeah, come round and join us, we're just chewing the fat over a glass or two of wine."
chib *   
Noun. A knife or blade. From the Romany chiv, or chive, meaning knife
Verb. 1. To slash, stab or cut off.
2. To smash someone on the face with a bottle and slash with the broken shards.
* Also chiv.
chicken    Noun. 1. A young person. Very common on the gay scene for an attractive young male.
2. A game of courage in which competitors dare one another to complete a given task. Usually a game of adolescence.
Adj. Cowardly. {Informal}
chick flick   Noun. A film (flick), often romantic and with a happy ending, and typically enjoyed by females (chick).
chick with dick   Noun. A male to female preoperative transexual, usually very feminine looking, with breasts and male genitals, a shemale. E.g."Last time I visited Bangkok the streets were lined with chicks with dicks, and they were so gorgeous too."
chief   Noun. 1. A general term of address.
2. A contemptible person. E.g."I'm not sitting next him, he's a fuckin' chief and I'll likely punch him before the meeting's finished." [London use]
chieftain (tank)   Noun. An act of masturbation. Rhyming slang on wank. [Mainly London use]
chill    Verb. To relax, take time out. Abb. of 'chill-out'. E.g."Hey calm down! You'll have a heart attack unless you learn to chill a little."
Noun. A time of relaxation. E.g."Are we having a chill tonight? Watch some TV, drink a little wine, and go out clubbing tomorrow night?"
chillax   Verb. To relax, to take time out. A combination of the words chill and relax. [Orig. U.S. Mid 1990s?]
chillaxing   Adj. Relaxing. See 'chillax'. [Orig. U.S.]
chilled    Adj. Relaxed.
chilling   Noun. Relaxing, taking time out. Often heard as chillin'. From 'chill out' (verb).
chill-out    Verb. To relax.
Noun. A time or place where people chill-out, often whilst on drugs or in a hot sweaty club.
chill pill   Noun. Something that reduces anxiety and stress, and promotes relaxation. Mainly used figuratively in phrases such 'take a chill pill'.
chin (someone)    Verb. To hit someone on the chin. E.g."I'm going to chin that idiot if he doesn't shut up."
china    Noun. A term of address, usually friendly. Derived from the cockney rhyming slang china plate, meaning mate. E.g."Alright china! How's it going then?"
ching   Noun. Cocaine.
chinglish   Noun. Pigeon English, a mixture of Chinese and English.
Chinky    Noun. 1. A Chinese person. Offens.
2. A Chinese restaurant or takeaway. Offens.
3. Chinese food, often a takeaway meal. Offens.
Adj. Chinese in nature. Offens.
chinless wonder   Noun. A person of the wealthy upper classes, who lacks depth of character and/or intelligence. Derog.
chin-wag    Noun. A conversation or chat.
Verb. To chat, talk.
chip   Verb. To leave, go. E.g."I've just had a call from Alex; he's waiting for us at the station - we'd better chip." [Orig. Black use]
chippy    Noun. 1. A chipshop. {Informal}
2. A carpenter. {Informal}
chirps   Verb. To chat up, to talk flirtatiously. E.g."I had a great night chirpsing the girls, and got the phone numbers of 3 gorgeous blondes." [Mainly London use]
chocker    Noun. Chocolate. Also chocko or the more childlike term chockies.
Adj. Very crowded, busy. Also phrased as chocko. From the expression chock-a-block.
chocolate drop   Noun. A black person. Offens.
chocolate fireguard   Noun. A useless thing. Usually heard in phrases such as "as useless as a chocolate fireguard." Cf. 'chocolate teapot'
chocolate starfish   Noun. The anus.
chocolate teapot   Noun. A useless thing. Usually heard in phrases such as "as useful as a chocolate teapot." E.g. "A car without wheels is as useful as a chocolate teapot." Cf. 'chocolate fireguard'
choice    Adj. The best, excellent. E.g."Your new boyfriend is choice; we get on really well."
choke the chicken   Vrb Phrs. To masturbate. E.g."It's no wonder you're tired, spending every waking hour choking the chicken!"
chokey    Noun. Prison.
chong it   Verb. To smoke marijuana/cannabis constantly. Possibly from the series of movies featuring the characters Cheech and Chong, both heavy marijuana smokers. [North West use?]
choochie face   Noun. Affectionate term of address, often used with respect to children and babies.
chopper    Noun. The penis.
choppers   Noun. Teeth.
chops    Noun. The mouth.
chopsing   Verb. Chatting. E.g."We spent the night chopsing in the bar and didn't get to see the film." [Stoke use]
chopsy   Adj. Chatty. [Stoke use]
chord    Noun. A bad mood. E.g."Sarah's in a right chord after smudging her lipstick just before the photograph was taken." [Widnes/Merseyside use]
chordy    Adj. Moody. See 'chord'. [Widnes/Merseyside use]
chore   Verb. To steal. From the Romany cor, to steal. E.g."You can't go choring senior citizen's pension books, it's unethical, even for a thief."
chow    Noun. Food.
Verb. 1. To eat.
2. To reprimand, tell off. [Hull/Yorkshire use]
Chrimble   Noun. Christmas. Cf. 'Crimbo'.
chrome dome   Noun. 1. A bald head.
2. A man with a bald head. Derog.
chubby chaser    Noun. A person who finds fat people attractive. More commonly used on the Gay scene.
chubbychops    Noun. Jocular and affectionate term of address for a podgy person.
chuck    Noun. An term of endearment. E.g."Come on chuck, let's go out whilst the sun's shining."
Verb. 1. To vomit. E.g."Harry's done his usual, he's missed the toilet and chucked all over the floor."
2. To terminate a relationship. E.g."I'm going to chuck her at the weekend, she's really annoying me with her moaning."
chucking out time   Phrs. The time when a public house, or bar, closes and asks their customers to leave the premises.
chuck it down    Vrb phrs. To rain, often heavily. E.g."I think we should stay in and order a takeaway, it's chucking it down."
chuck one's guts up   Vrb phrs. To vomit. E.g."He's had his head down the toilet all night chucking his guts up."
chuck one's muck    Vrb phrs. To ejaculate semen. E.g."He chucked his muck and stained the sofa."
chuck up    Verb. To vomit. E.g."I can't come to work, I've been chucking up all night."
chud   Noun. Chewing-gum.
chuddy    Noun. Chewing-gum.
chuff    Noun. 1. Rubbish, nonsense. E.g."That film was boring, too long, and generally just total chuff."
2. The anus. [Orig Aust.]
3. The vagina.
4. A passing of wind from the anus, a 'fart'.
Also used as a euphemism for 'fuck' in expressions such as the denial - "Did I chuff!"
Verb. To break wind. E.g."She chuffed just as we were saying grace before dinner"
chuffed    Adj. Pleased, delighted. Compare with 'dischuffed' and 'chuffed to buggery'. E.g."I'm well chuffed at the result." [1950s]
chuffed as nuts   Adj. Extremely pleased.
chuffed to buggery / fuck    Adj. Very pleased. E.g."She's chuffed to buggery that they are marrying before the baby is born."
chuffer    Noun. 1. A contemptible person.
2. An annoying, difficult or disappointing occurrence. E.g."It's a right chuffer, breaking my leg just before the football season starts."
Chuffer is a euphemism for 'fucker'.
chuffer (train)   Noun. A train. Children's talk. Also chuff chuff.
chuffing    Adj. An intensifier, and euphemism for 'fucking'. E.g."That chuffing idiot scratched my favourite CD and now it sticks on the third track."
chuffin 'ell!    Exclam. Expressing anger, surprise etc. A euphemism for 'fuckin hell'.
chugger   
Noun. A person paid to collect for charity by signing up people to make regular donations, often by direct debit. Working on busy shopping streets chuggers are often young people and will usually be seen carrying clipboards. The term is a cross between charity and mugger. [2002]
chuggy   Noun. Chewing gum. [Scottish use]
chump    Noun. 1. A fool, a disliked person. {Informal}. Derog.
2. The head.
chunder *   Noun. Vomit.
Verb. To vomit. E.g."I just made it to the toilet before I chundered."
* [Orig. Aust.]
chung   Adj. Attractive. Mainly teenspeak. [2000s]
chunner    Verb. To mutter, grumble, talk incessantly. E.g."He's always chunnering on about nothing, he bores me silly."
chunter    Verb. Meaning the same as 'chunner'. {Informal}
chutney ferret   Noun. A homosexual male. Derog.
cig / ciggy    Noun. A cigarette. {Informal}
clagnuts    Noun. Faecal remnants adhering to the anal hairs or fur. Also clag nuts.
clanger    Noun. A mistake or blunder. Cf. 'drop a clanger'.
clap    Noun. Gonorrhoea. [1500s.]
clap eyes on    Phrs. To notice. E.g."He clapped eyes on her across the dancefloor and knew he was falling in love."
clapped out    Adj. Worn out, broken. Usually applied to machinery. E.g."That car's just a clapped out heap of junk that needs scrapping."
Claire Rayners   Noun. Trainers (the footwear). Rhyming slang. Claire Rayner, known mainly for her role as TV/newspaper agony aunt. [1990s]
claret   Noun. Blood. From its colour.
clarty    Adj. 1. Sticky, gooey, messy.
2. Dirty. [Scottish use]
class   Noun. Of distinction, high quality, excellent. E.g."We went to the boxing last night - it was class fight that went the full distance."
clayhead   Noun. A person from Stoke on Trent. Stoke, in the Midlands of England, is commonly called the Potteries.
clean    Adj. Having no drugs, weapons or illicit goods on one's person. E.g."You can't arrest me officer, I'm clean!"
clegnuts   Noun. Faecal remnants that are stuck to the anal hairs, or fur on animals. Also cleg nuts.
clemmed   Adj. Hungry. Also spelt 'klempt'. [Wigan use. Dialect]
clemmy   Noun. A stone or brick for throwing. [N. Yorks/ N.E. use]
clever-clogs    Noun. A person who is or claims to be clever or have greater knowledge. Also clever-dick. {Informal}
climb the walls    Vrb phrs. To reach a state of severe agitation through stress or worry. E.g."He's been climbing the walls waiting for his exam results."
clingin    Adj. Unpleasant, disgusting. [Scottish use]
cling-ons    Noun. Excrement that adheres to anal hairs, or fur on animals. Also clingons. Cf. 'klingons'.
clink    Noun. Prison. It is derived either from the name of Clink Street, London, on which a prison was situated, or from the sound of doors locking.
clinkers    Noun. Excrement that adheres to anal hairs, or fur, on an animal.
clippie   Noun. A bus conductor. The employee, extra to the driver, who checks and supplies tickets whilst on the bus. From their clipping of tickets. {Informal}.
clit    Noun. Abb. of clitoris.
clobber    Noun. Clothes and personal belongings. {Informal}
Verb. To hit. E.g."I clobbered him over the head with a pool cue and made a break for the exit."
clock    Verb. 1. To notice. E.g."Once I clocked him looking suspicious, he left the shop without stealing anything."
2. To hit or punch. E.g."I'm going to end up clocking that idiot if he doesn't shut his big mouth!"
Noun. The face.
clodhopper    Noun. A large heavy shoe. [1830s] {Informal}
clone    Noun. A distinct type of 'gay' image, being stereotypically masculine and epitomized by short hair, bristle moustaches, jeans or leathers. A good example being the 1970s 'gay' icons, The Village People.
closet    Noun. The condition where one's homosexuality is concealed. 'Coming out of the closet' implying living true to one's sexuality.
clot    Noun. An idiot, fool. Derog. {Informal}
cloth-ears    Noun. Someone who has poor hearing or doesn't pay attention to imparted information. From the {Informal}uial adjective cloth-eared - deaf.
clout   Noun. Vagina.
clown's pocket   Noun. A large or spacious vagina.
cludgie    Noun. A lavatory. Also shortened to cludge.
clue up    Verb. To inform.
clued up    Adj. Knowledgeable, informed. E.g."He's well clued up about the local music scene."
clunge    Noun. The anus.
clusterfuck   Noun. A disasterous situation, a mess up, a shambles.
cobblers (!)    Exclam. An exclamation of disagreement. Derived from the noun.
Noun. Rubbish, nonsense. From the rhyming slang cobblers awls, meaning 'balls'.
cob    Verb. To throw. [Northern use]
Noun. A bread bun or loaf. {Informal}
cob on    Noun. A temper. E.g."She had a right cob-on when I told her I'd spent all our holiday money."
cock    Noun. 1. The penis. [1400s]
2. A term of address, usually affectionate. E.g."Right cock, that'll be 46 pence please. Would you like it in a bag?"
3. Rubbish, nonsense.
cock a snook/snoot   Vrb phrs. To openly show contempt or disrespect. From the action of placing one's hand infront of the face with thumb touching the nose and fingers spread and extended, used to express contempt. {Informal}
cocker   Noun. A friendly form of address, usually to a male. Also 'old cocker'.
cockhead   Noun. A contemptible person, an idiot.
cock jockey   Noun. A homosexual male. Derog.
cock knocker *   
Noun. 1. A contemptible person. [Orig. U.S.?]
2. A homosexual male. [Orig. U.S.?]
* Also cockknocker and cocknocker.
cock snot   Noun. Semen. See 'snot'.
cocksucker    Noun. A contemptible person.
cockteaser    Noun. A person who sexually teases males.
cock-up    Noun. A mess, a shambles.
Verb. To make a mistake, to ruin. E.g."I've cocked up again and my wife's left with the kids."
cod    Verb. To hoax, to joke. E.g."Stop codding me and tell me the truth."
codger    Noun. An elderly male. Usually prefixed with 'old'. {Informal}
codhead   Noun. A person from Fleetwood. A traditional fishing port in the county of Lancashire.
cods   Noun. Testicles.
codswallop    Noun. Nonsense.
coffin dodger   Noun. An elderly person. Derog.
coffin nail    Noun. A cigarette.
coggy   Noun. See 'croggy'. [NE Midlands/Northern use]
coin it (in)    Verb. To make large amounts of money, to profit. E.g."He's coining it now he's opened a shop on the high street."
coke    Noun. Cocaine.
coked up    Adj. To be intoxicated with cocaine.
colder than a witch's tit   Phrs. Very cold, when applied to the weather, or air temperature.
coldfish    Noun. A person who is unemotional or insensitive.
(the) cold shoulder    Noun. The act of deliberately ignoring. Derived from the s.e. verb - to cold shoulder. E.g."She smiled straight at me but I gave her the cold shoulder."
cold turkey    Noun. Withdrawal from addictive drugs and the consequential pains and discomfort, including goosepimples, hence the name.
collywobbles    Noun. A feeling of nervousness or discomfort in the stomach. {Informal}
come    Verb. To orgasm. The common slang convention of mispelling words also gives us the variation 'cum'.
Noun. Sexually ejaculated fluid, usually applied to semen and regularly spelt 'cum'.
come a cropper    Vrb phrs. 1. To fall heavily.
2. To fail.
comedown    Noun. The depression and tiredness after the cessation of a bout of drug taking.
come it   Verb. To act in an impudent manner. E.g."Don't come it with me! I said you can't have any more money."
come on    Noun. An enticement, often potentiating a relationship.
Verb. To begin menstruating. A commonly used euphemism.
come onto    Verb. To 'chat up'.
come out    Verb. To openly reveal one's homosexuality. Cf. 'out' and 'closet'.
commando   Noun. Without underwear. See 'go commando'.
Commie    Noun. Abbreviation of Communist. Usually derog.
common   Noun. Abb. of common sense.
common as muck    Adj. Very common, usually applied to an unsophisticated and uncultured person. Derog. {Informal}
common or garden    Phrs. Ordinary, plain. {Informal}
complete and utter   Adj. Total. Usually prefixing derogatory terms such as 'bastard' or 'twat'.
completely hatstand   Adj. Crazy, insane. Originally from Viz comic. Often abb. to 'hatstand'. Cf. 'totally hatstand'.
con artist    Noun. A confidence trickster.
conflab   Noun. A chat, conversation. Also the variation confab. From confabulation. E.g."Before we set off, let's have a conflab about which route we should take." [Informal]
confuzzle   Verb. To confuse. Also confuzzled, confuzzling. [Orig. U.S.]
conk    Noun. The nose. {Informal}
conkers   Noun. Testicles. A Conker (British) is the hard shiny nut of the horse chestnut tree.
conk out    Verb. 1. To breakdown, often of machinery. E.g."I may be late, my car's conked out so I'm getting the bus to work."
2. To become unconscious.
cooking with gas    Vrb phrs. To succeed, to proceed well. E.g."After a beer, the work went well. We were cooking with gas."
cool (!)   Adj. 1. Excellent, great. [Orig. U.S.]
2. OK. [Orig. U.S.]
coon   Noun. A black person. Derog/Offens.
cop    Verb. 1. To commune with someone sexually desirable, occasionally in so much as having sex. An abbreviation of 'cop off.'
2. To take. E.g."Cop hold of this hammer whilst I get the spanner." Also Cop this! - a facetious remark said immediately prior to an aggressive act.
3. A policeman/woman. Abb. of 'copper'. [Mid 1800s/Orig. U.S.]
Adj. Value, worth. Heard in expressions such as 'no cop' or 'any cop'.
cop a feel    Vrb phrs. Get a feel of something, often applied to a grope of a sexual nature. E.g."Is it any wonder that she reported him for sexual harrassment, he always copped a feel of her bottom whenever she walked past his desk."
cop a plea    Vrb phrs. Plead guilty to a reduced charge.
cop-it    Vrb phrs. To get into trouble.
cop off    Verb. To commune with someone sexually desirable, occasionally in so much as having sex. E.g."I copped off with a gorgeous girl last night." [Orig. North England]
cop-out    Noun. An excuse, an avoidance of guilt. [Orig. U.S.]
Verb. To withdraw from participation. E.g."Rumour has it that Johnny's copped-out."
copper    Noun. A policeman/woman. [Orig. U.S. Mid 1800s]
cop-shop    Noun. A Police Station.
cop some zeds    Phrs. To sleep.
cor blimey!    Exclam. This mild exclamation of surprise is a corruption of the oath god blind me.
corker    Noun. An excellent thing or person.
corking    Adj. Excellent, splendid.
corn beef legs   Noun. Legs with mottled, blotchy skin, reminiscent of the meat, corn beef.
corned beef   Adj. Deaf. Rhyming slang for deef, a Scottish pronunciation of deaf. [Glasgow use]
corporation pop    Noun. Water. Dated expression. See 'pop'. [Northern use]
correctomundo   Adj. Correct. Usually as exclamation and in a patronising manner. Also correctomondo.
Corry    Noun. Abb of Coronation Street, the British 'soap'. See 'Brooky' and 'Stenders'.
cosh   Noun. A heavy stick or bar used as a weapon. {Informal}
Verb. To hit over the head with a cosh (see noun). {Informal}
cost a bomb   Verb phrs. To be very expensive.
cotch   Verb. To relax. [London use/ Orig W.I.]
cottage    Verb. The act of soliciting illicit and anonymous sex in a public place by male homosexuals. The 'cottage' will often be a public lavatory; taking its name from when such UK conveniences looked cottage like.
cotton on   Verb. To become aware, to notice. E.g."I cottoned on to the scam (trick) when I saw him wink at that woman." {Informal}
couch commando   Noun. The person at home who has control of the TV remote controller. Also couch commander. [Orig. U.S.]
couch potato    Noun. A lazy person who idles away time, usually watching the television. [Orig. U.S.]
cough (up)    Verb. To hand over something, or reveal some information, often reluctantly. E.g. "I've already coughed up a month's wages, and can't afford any more."
couldn't organise a piss-up in a brewery   Phrs. Of a person, totally incompetent.
couldn't stop a pig in an alleyway   Phrs. Having bow legs. Occasionally heard as couldn't stop a pig in a ginnel, - a Midlands/Northern variation whereby ginnel is dialect for alleyway.
council gritter   Noun. Anus. From the rhyming slang on 'shitter'. See 'shitter'.
council pop   Noun. Water. Cf. 'corporation pop'.
coupon    Noun. The face. [Scottish/Irish use]
cow    Noun. 1. A contemptible woman, a 'bitch'. Derogatory, but often used less aggressively, as an affectionate aside, as in 'silly cow', see also 'moo'.
2. A difficult or objectionable task or thing. E.g."It was a cow of a job, and took twice as long as I expected."
cowbag   Noun. A contemptible female.
cowboy    Noun. A person who is unscrupulous and unqualified in business. Often with regard to 'cowboy' builders.
cowboy outfit   Noun. A group of people, unscrupulous and unqualified in business, working under the guise of a respectable business.
cowing   Adj. Euph. for 'fucking', when used as an intensifier. E.g."That cowing bastard from the sales team got the promotion to manager."
cow juice    Noun. Milk.
cozzie    Noun. A swimming costume.
crabby    Adj. Moody or short tempered.
crabs    Noun. Pubic lice.
crack    
Noun. 1. Freebased cocaine. The name derives from the sound made during its manufacture. [Orig. U.S.]
2. The vagina.
3. Between the buttocks.
4. As the crack, the situation, news, gossip. E.g."So what's the crack with this argument that you and Sonya have been having?" [Orig. Irish]
5. Pleasure, fun. From the Irish craic. E.g."Last night was a crack, especially with Mandy doing that drunken striptease." See 'good crack'. [Orig. Irish]
6. Women, viewed as sexual objects. Offens.
cracker   Noun. 1. A thing that is excellent. E.g."That West End show was a cracker." {Informal}
2. An attractive person, particularly a woman. {Informal}
crackers    Adj. Crazy.
crackhead    Noun. An addict of 'crack' (freebased cocaine).
cracking    Adj. Brilliant, wonderful. E.g."They gave a cracking performance last night and got a well deserved 5 minute standing ovation."
Adv. An intensifier such as extremely, outstandingly. E.g."We had a cracking good time last night."
cracking (the) flags   Phrs. 1. Very hot weather.
2. Raining heavily.
crackling    Noun. A sexually desirable woman or women.
(the) crack of sparrow's fart   Noun. Dawn, or specifically the crack of dawn. E.g."I was out of bed at the crack of sparrow's fart this morning."
crack on   Verb. To progress, to go quickly. E.g."We'll crack on with the meeting after lunch."
crack one off   Verb. To masturbate, with reference to the male. E.g."As soon as he has a spare 2 minutes, he's off to the toilet and cracking one off."
crack on to   Vrb Phrs. To come onto somebody, to make sexual advances. E.g."She was cracking on to me all night, and every other bloke at the club."
crackpot    Noun. An insane or eccentric person.
Adj. Mad, eccentric, unworkable. E.g."I'm not going along with Suzanne's crackpot ideas."
crack up    Verb. 1. To breakdown with laughter.
2. To mentally breakdown. {Informal}
cradle snatcher    Noun. A person who dates or marries someone considerably younger than themselves. Derog.
crafty butcher   Noun. A homosexual male. From delivering meat via the 'backdoor'.
crank up    Verb. 1. To increase, often with reference to the volume of music.
2. To inject drugs. E.g."He cranked up some more smack (heroin) and passed out on the floor."
crap (!)    Noun. 1. Nonsense, rubbish, something useless or not good.
2. An act of defecation.
3. Faeces.
Exclam. An exclamation of disbelief, annoyance.
Verb. To defecate. Defecate is infact a euphemism meaning to purify or cleanse. E.g."He crapped behind a tree and wiped his arse (anus) with a huge leaf."
Adj. Rubbishy, of no worth.
crapbag   Noun. A generally disparaging term for a person, or thing.
crapper   Noun. A toilet.
crappy    Adj. Rubbishy, useless, of poor quality.
crash    Verb. 1. To share, loan or borrow. E.g."That's the third cigarette you've crashed off me in the last hour!"
2. To temporarily stay over or sleep at a place other than at one's own usual abode. E.g."Can I crash at yours tonight? It'll cost too much for a taxi home."
Noun. The situation of crashing (See 'crash' verb). E.g."Come on, get your cigarettes out, it's your crash."
crash out    Verb. To pass out due to intoxication or tiredness.
crate    Noun. A delapidated vehicle. Derog.
crater face    Noun. A face with pock marked skin or the person with such a face.
craven   Adj. Greedy. [Orig W.I./Black use]
crawl    Verb. To be obsequious. {Informal}
cream    Verb. 1. To ejaculate. To cream oneself implies great sexual excitement, but often used figuratively.
2. To succeed. E.g."I thought I'd creamed my exams but I failed all but one."
cream crackered    Adj. Tired out, exhausted. Rhyming slang on 'knackered'.
cream one's jeans / pants / knickers   Vrb phrs. To be very excited, so much so that one figuratively ejaculates. Not always necessarily sexual excitement. E.g."I creamed my pants when I first saw Emma, she's one sexy lady."
creampie   Noun. The view of recently deposited semen oozing from a vagina or anus. An expression originating in the porn industry. [Orig U.S.]
crease    Noun. The anus.
crease up    Verb. To laugh heartily. E.g."I creased up when he spilled coffee on his suit, the next day he gave me the sack."
create   Verb. To make a fuss, to complain. E.g."If she's going to create all night, then I'm going home to get some peace and quiet." {Informal}
cred    Adj. That which is acceptably fashionable, abb. of credible. See 'street cred.'
creep    Noun. A contemptible person, in particular, one who is fawning.
Verb. To act obsequiously. {Informal}
creepy-crawly    Noun. An insect, or spider, usually viewed distastefully. E.g."Don't go in the cellar, it's damp and full of creepy-crawlies." {Informal}
crib    Verb. 1. To copy, usually in an underhand or unfair manner. {Informal}
2. To complain, grumble. Uncommon usage.
crikey!    Exclam. Used to express surprise or astonishment.
Crimble   Noun. Christmas. Cf. 'crimbo'.
Crimbo   Noun. Christmas. Also spelt Chrimbo. Cf. 'Chrimble'. {Informal} [1980s]
crimp off a length   Vrb phrs. To defecate.
crimp one off   Vrb phrs. To defecate.
cringeworthy    Adj. Likely to promote embarrassment or apprehension.
crinkly    Noun. A geriatric person. From the appearence of their aging skin. Derog.
croak    Verb. 1. To die.
2. To kill. E.g."I'm going to croak that idiot if he doesn't shut up soon."
crock   Noun. Nonsense. Abb. of 'crock of shit'.
crock of shit    Noun. Nonsense, a worthless thing, of poor quality. E.g."Why not buy a new car? Yours is ancient, it's a crock of shit."
croggy   Noun. A pillion ride on a single seat bicycle. Cf. 'backie' and 'coggy''. [NE Midlands/Northern use]
crotch rot   
Noun. General term for a sexual infection of the genitals, or venereal disease.
crown    Verb. To hit on the head. E.g."Can you see a lump on my head? I've just crowned myself getting up."
Croydon facelift   Noun. A style of haircut, as worn by females, and typically associated with the working classes. It involves pulling the hair into a pony tail, and tying it so tightly at the back of the head that the resulting skin across the face is pulled taught, as though in a facelift. Usually derog.
crozzle   Verb. To dry out and become crispy due to burning or heat. E.g."I've thrown out last night's pizza, it was all crozzled." [Yorkshire use]
crucial    Adj. Great, excellent, essential. E.g."I'm going to buy that new tune by the Kaiser Chiefs, it's crucial."
cruckle   Verb. To twist one's ankle, to fall over on one's ankle. [Rochdale use/Dialect?]
crud (!)    Noun. Rubbish, something useless.
Exclam. An exclamation of disagreement.
cruddy    Adj. Useless, unpleasant, cheap and nasty.
cruise    Verb. To search for a sexual encounter. Originates from when U.S. teenagers would 'cruise' around in cars looking to pick up some company. The expression is mainly used on the 'gay' scene. [Orig. U.S. 1950s]
cruising for a bruising   Vrb phrs. Acting in a manner that will get one into trouble, or a fight. [Orig. U.S.]
crumbs !    Exclam. A mild exclamation of surprise or amazement.
crumpet    Noun. Sexually desirable person. E.g."The club was bursting its walls with crumpet." {Informal}
crustie    Noun. A person whose looks share that of the 'hippie' travellers of the 1990s and being stereotypically scruffy, with long dredded hair, wearing boots and black clothes; generally having the appearance of being homeless. Usually derog.
cry on (about something)   Vrb phrs. To complain (about something). E.g."She wont stop crying on about my bad language, but she swears more than anyone I know."
culchie    Noun. A rural dweller, a bumpkin, a yokel. Mainly derog. [Irish use]
culture vulture    Noun. A person keen to acquire culture. {Informal}
cum   Noun/Verb. See 'come'.
cunning stunt   Noun. A spoonerism on stunning cunt, and adopted by users for its comic ambiguity and numerous meanings, ranging from an impressive female to an objectionable person.
cunny    Noun. The female genitals. Derived from 'cunt'.
cunt (!) *   Noun. 1. The female genitals.
2. Women from a sexual viewpoint. Offensive.
3. A despicable person. Derog. and coarse, and with its associated meanings is consequently particularly offensive.
4. A very familiar term of address. E.g."Hello you old cunt, how are you? You're looking well."
5. A difficult thing or task. E.g."I'm not offering to help him move house, he's got a piano and it'll be a cunt of a job to shift it."
Exclam. An exclamation of anger, surprise, frustration, disappointment.

* Undoubtedly the most offensive and taboo of all vulgarisms, and particularly so to women, however its use is becoming more frequent. Consequently it is gradually losing its offensiveness and perhaps will in due course become as accepted as 'fuck' in its use. The word goes back to Middle English, cunte, and before then it can only be speculated upon, however some believe its origins lie with the Latin, cuneus, meaning wedge.
cunted    Adj. Very intoxicated by drink or drugs.
cunt-face    Noun. A contemptible person. Also cuntface.
cunt-faced    Adj. Very intoxicated.
cunting   Adj. An intensifier. E.g."If this cunting weather doesn't improve within the next 24 hours we'll have to cancel the whole trip."
cuntox   Noun. A contemptible person.
cunt struck   Adj. Sexually besotted by a woman. Also cuntstruck.
cunty   Noun. A contemptible person.
cuntybaws *   Noun. 1. An objectionable person. [Scottish use]
2. Occasionally used as a term of address. [Scottish use]
* From cuntyballs.
cuppa    Noun. A cup of tea or lately also referring to coffee. The term is a contraction of cup of. {Informal}
curl one off / down   Verb. To defecate.
currant bun    Noun. 1. The sun. Cockney rhyming slang.
2. The Sun newspaper. A tabloid newspaper that adopted the rhyming slang expression for its own use.
3. Son. Rhyming slang.
curry-mile    Noun. The name given to an area in Manchester called Rusholme, which has a high density of asian restaurants and food takeaways positioned along its main street.
curry queen    Noun. A gay male who is attracted to asian homosexuals. Cf. 'dinge queen' and 'scat queen'. Offens.
curtains    Noun. The end. E.g."If he doesn't make this jump, it's curtains for the whole team."
cushy    Adj. Of an easy nature. Originates from the Hindustani khush meaning pleasant. {Informal}
cushy number    Noun. A situation that is easy and without stress.
cushty   Adj. Excellent, fine, OK. Also spelt cushdy, and kushty.
custard chucker   Noun. The penis. Often prefixed with blue veined, or purple headed.
cut   Noun. A canal. [Midlands/North use]
cut the crap!    Exclam. Stop talking nonsense!
cuz   Noun. 1. Abb. of cousin. [Mainly Black use]
2. Friend. [Mainly Black use]
Conj. Abb. of because.
C-word    Noun. A coy euphemism for 'cunt'. Cf. 'f-word'.
cyberpunk    Noun. A nonconformist advocate of modern technology, especially such a user of the Internet.
cyberspace    Noun. The imaginary place that exists between computers and their users, particularly on the Internet and in virtual reality. The term was coined by the author William Gibson in the book Neuromancer.